Clash of the Titans (D)

(Rated PG-13 for brief sensuality, frightening images, fantasy-action violence):  The "clash" results from a power struggle between men against kings & kings against gods.  And since this is based on Greek mythology, the producers of this flick have deemed to use (waste) some fine Brit talents who wander in a confused pattern of noise & action, all done in what appears to be a classic Greek acting style - choruses & all. 

And that's the basic problem with this remake of the 1981 original, with Ray Harryhausen's jerky but impressive stop action critters along with the hammy actors never meant to be taken seriously - while this extravagantly mounted production with Nick Davis' super-duper special effects, Louis Leterrier's over-the-top direction, Phil Hay/Matt Manfredi's script (with lines like Hades' "You are specks of dust beneath our fingernailsŠ"), Peter Menzie's dizzying hand-held camera photography, Lindy Hemming's gaudy costuming & a blasting musical score that never ends - all taken far too seriously to be anything more than a disappointing 106-minutes of sound & fury signifying very little.

Adding to that, the post production people decided to turn the 2D finished film into a pseudo 3D effect which did nothing more, I'm told, than add muchos dolares to the ticket price, so what you have here is a hugely lavish & super expensive near worthless remake.

Sam Worthington, Liam Neeson, Ralph Fiennes, Alexsa Daalos et al chew up the scenery, but the result once again exceeds the disappointing material with which they are forced to work.  The result:  a horrible waste of time, money & talented actors & technicians. 

Oh, there are occasionally impressive CGI effects, notably with the flying creatures - a magnificent black Pegasus, some giant metallic, clicking scorpions and a brief scene with a terrifying snake-headed Medusa to provide a moment or two with interest - while the BIG climactic wham/bam/splash/big-mouthed roaring kraken climax is nothing more than a repetition of so many other similar critters and a supreme bust.

As bad as most remakes are, this one really settles to the bottom.  Even the most easily satisfied audiences leave in disappointment.  By all means, miss it.  (Grade:  D)